Strangely Dim

I'm probably the worst, most inconsistent blogger ever. Most of the time it's because I feel like no one really cares about my boring life or my random thoughts, but obviously you are at least curious if you're here reading this. SO here goes nothing! :)

As you noticed, I gave my blog some cute new decor. I even got all technical and figured out how to add this sweet picture at the top! Feeling like a pro now.

Anyways; I am graduating in 23 days! I can't even believe four years has come down to this. It is almost here! This semester I have been precepting with Amy on Labor & Delivery at Huntsville hospital and y'all.... I am pretty sure I found my calling! I LOVE it. The Lord's hand was all over the circumstances leading up to my placement on that unit. Story time! :)

Last semester we had to turn in our "yellow cards" for precepting placements. They were due on the first week of my OB class. So I put down a post surgical unit as my first choice; seemed like a good enough option. Then I got into my OB class and it rocked my world. I had never enjoyed studying for a class so much. Then I had my L&D clinical rotation and a light bulb went off. This is what I wanted to do! So I emailed my teacher and asked to change my precepting placement choice to L&D. She said okay, and I felt confident I would get a spot. Then December rolls around and placements are released. Where was I? The post surgical unit. Not gonna lie, I cried. And pouted. Then a few weeks later I read Jeremiah 29:1-14. This is where the Lord's people were captured and taken from Jerusalem to Babylon. God commanded them to make a home there, to be prosperous, to pray for that city, and to thrive there. He said the He would gather them back up & He would keep His promise, but told them flourish where He had placed them at that time. It was clear as day. I wrote in my journal "Work hard and make the most of my preceptorship placement... It may not have been my first choice but the Lord has placed me there for a reason!" That was the end of the story. I accepted it and moved on to call my preceptor. She proceeded to tell me she no longer wanted a student, so I was back to square one. I no longer had a place to work. BUT this opened a new door. I sent a text to my awesome friend, Amy Hall, and asked if she had been assigned a student (she is an L&D nurse)-- she said no, and admitted she had asked not to be given a student. So I told her my situation and she SO graciously offered to be my preceptor. I talked with my teachers, we got it all approved, and three months later here I am on L&D and absolutely LOVING it. Had I been placed on L&D to begin with, I wouldn't have been placed with Amy, I may not have been on day shift, I may not have been placed at Huntsville Hospital (where I really wanted to be) .... He just worked it out in the most perfect way and all in His timing! *HUGE shout out to Amy! Thank you thank you thank you!!!* :)

So I tell that story because I want you to know how absolutely dumb and forgetful I am. I make fun of the Israelites because they constantly forgot all about the miracles God had done for them, yet I am no different so much of the time... With graduation approaching, I have starting really stressing about whether or not I am going to get a job offer. Amy has had to calm me down on more than one occasion; it has been a real struggle. I feel like I need to be doing something to work it out or make it happen, when I have already done all that I can. What I need to do now is give it over to the Lord. He worked out my precepting position, why do I doubt that He will work out my job situation as well? It may not look like what I want it to or hope it will, but regardless, He has a plan and He will work it out. I need to surrender.

Today while I was in the car, my mind was rushing over this situation. I've been hearing all about everyone else's job offers and it was really freaking me out. Then I heard this amazing song, and peace fell over me in an instant. I am so so thankful for that moment. So here are the lyrics and a link to the video. I hope this helps someone as much as it helped me today. Thank you Jesus for your unexpected messages throughout my day. :)

I've got all these plans piled up sky high
A thousand dreams on hold
And I don't know why I got a front row seat
To the longest wait
And I just can't see Past the things I pray Today

But when I fix my eyes on all that You are
Then every doubt I feel Deep in my heart
Grows strangely dim
All my worries fade And fall to the ground
Cause when I seek Your face And don't look around
Any place I'm in Grows strangely dim

I don't know, I don't know
What tomorrow may hold
But I know, but I know
That You're holding it all
So no matter what may come

I'm gonna fix my eyes on all that You are
'Til every doubt I feel Deep in my heart
Grows strangely dim
Let all my worries fade And fall to the ground
I'm gonna seek Your face And not look around
Til the place I'm in
Grows strangely, strangely, strangely dim

Strangely Dim